Nerd Epiphany

I was reading a post on today talking about women in heavily male-dominated, heavily logic-based fields like computer science, and how they often are very unhappy with their lives.

Something in my head clicked as they mentioned that these women were trying to control the storm of their emotions, rather than ride it out.

Something really fucking nerdy.

I started thinking about Saidar and Saidin, the gendered sources of magic in the Wheel of Time universe.  One of the core principles of the series is that the two are very different.

For one, Saidin is tainted when the story begins.  Every man who uses its power eventually goes mad, destroying what he loved.  This is due to the corruption of the big bad, Shaitan.

You can read into that what you will about the idea of toxic masculinity, but (SPOILERS) the main character Rand Al’Thor eventually manages to cleanse Saidin, letting the male mages stay sane despite their use of magic.

I also love how Red Pill theory colors the actions of those men who, following Rand Al’Thor, knowingly train themselves in the use of their magical abilities in order to fight the Dark One (Shaitan).  They know they’re going to go crazy and die, and yet… they have power.  They have to use it.  They call themselves Soldiers. This is a clear message on male disposability, and the strength of the men who accept this and do what needs to be done for society anyway.

Anyway, the biggest difference, the one that made something click in my head, was that Saidar has to be guided, while Saidin has to be dominated.  Women who try to grab hold of the flow of their magic and force it inevitably find it to be an overpowering river that sucks them in and destroys them; it’s only safe to suggest and cajole, and this philosophy extends to the way in which they use their magic as well as how they control it.  The female mages, the Aes Sedai, are master manipulators.

Men who try to guide their magic, by contrast, find that it resists guidance.  It is wild, and must be dominated, forced to do as they wish.  This is, again, represented in how they approach the world.  Rand Al’Thor gathers armies and topples nations.

Now that I’m on the subject, holy shit.  The entire series is so Red Pill it hurts.  (SPOILERS) Perrin doesn’t get his wife under control until he stops being a beta shit that won’t yell at her.  She shit tests him constantly, and as much as he says “no sweetie I only love you that girl who’s flirting with me doesn’t mean anything,” she keeps being bitchy about it.  It’s when he finally shouts her down about her being stupid and decides he’s going to be a fucking king that she is content with her choice of mate.

Matt gets the goddamn Empress to qualify herself to him.  He shows high value constantly by flirting with women around her, and treats her like a child… and this is a woman who nobody treated with anything but the utmost respect in her homeland.  She falls for him like a fucking brick.  And it will probably last because Matt is too damned wily to ever truly submit to her worldly power.

Rand Al’Thor gets the fucking HAREM ending.  I don’t know if I need to say more on him, really.  Three strong, independent women who didn’t need no man fall all over themselves to get his baby in them, so much so that they agree they’ll share him.  Happily.  Because he’s the baddest motherfucker in the world, and is metaphorically the role model for male power, in that he cleansed Saidin.

Nerd Epiphany

Manliness and Maek Fite

When I was a kid, I took a kid’s karate class after school.  I loved it.  I loved Power Rangers, I loved Monks from Final Fantasy Tactics, I loved the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: I loved martial arts and I stuck with it from second grade all the way through to sixth.  I went during the summer as well as during the school year.  I kept going for as long as parents would keep driving me, until finally sometime in middle school it was just too much for them to get me there often enough and keep paying for the lessons.

I got to a red belt, which in the system I was in meant I was only one rank off from a full-on black belt.  I was often a higher rank than many of the adults who would come to train at the dojo sometimes.  But after I went to a couple of local tournaments, I realized something.  While almost nobody was my age and rank, the few others who were could *kick my butt* in sparring.  I certainly didn’t feel on their level.  It was around now that I started to doubt whether I’d really learned enough to feel dangerous, like a black belt should be.  I was around the age where some of the boys are really developing an adult male physique, playing sports… and the girls obviously were starting to develop too.

I don’t think this was a coincidence.

I asked my sensei if I could start over again, because I felt like I hadn’t earned the rank I had.  She told me that she only gave ranks to people who had earned them, and not to worry.

Maybe I would have become a really dangerous person in time.  Probably, in fact.  I think I had just been staying in a kids’ program, and was starting to realize that it wasn’t really the same as an adult’s program.

I feel like I’ve learned more in a month of jiu-jitsu twice a week as an adult than my entire time in karate as a child.  I get hurt, bruised.  My ego doesn’t, because it’s standing happily out of the way.  I have no ego in the gym, just a thirst for knowledge.  Respect for these people who are ahead of me by so much and so friendly and willing to share.

My posture changes after a session of jiu-jitsu.  I get into that low-slung, wide-shouldered stance.  Fighting puts me in a positive mindset.

Someone asked me today if I was no longer getting nervous while I was rolling (sparring).  I realized that I had never been nervous.  I had come in the first time trying to remember to keep breathing, and to tap out if they had me in a submission.  I was focusing on not getting injured, and learning what I could.  And I have been learning, from watching how the higher belts block me when I try something, seeing what they do to proactively take me down.

I am so very, very glad I decided to go hard back into martial arts.  For anyone who watches a wuxia film, or loves playing a Monk in Diablo 3, or thinks Street Fighter characters are super badass… seriously.  Go to a fighting gym of some type.  The positive feelings are worth every last bruise.

Manliness and Maek Fite

First Post

This blog currently exists to facilitate commenting on threads I find interesting.

It may expand to something more at some point as I start really considering what I want to say.

The origin of the username is something of an inside joke, combined with an idea of what I want to do with my life.  There’s an implied “clearly” at the end of the phrase.

I seek truth, even if the truth is harsh.  This search has led me to adopt two unpopular belief structures, though both are on the rise.  The first is atheism – obviously I’m not a gnostic atheist, as it’s impossible to prove a negative – and the second is what’s usually called “The Red Pill,” or the belief that modern society is heavily weighted against the male sexual strategy, and that much of what men are taught about how to approach intersexual interaction is complete horseshit.

This puts me in a pretty uncomfortable place, as even within either community, the intersection with the other appears to be somewhat slim.  Both groups are not approved of in American culture, one being labeled as misogynists, and the other allegedly doomed to suffer torment for eternity.  Obviously I don’t think either of those claims is true, but it certainly means that some of my core beliefs can’t be worn on my sleeve in day to day life.

I’m a long time fan of science and technology, and a student of history. It’s likely that my future posts will deal with how religion, science, technology, politics, law, and intersexual dynamics come together to create situations worth discussing.

First Post